Sunday, September 30, 2007


I had an epiphany the other day.

I was thinking about how lately I don't feel so judged or work so hard to make other people think well of me. I noticed that the more judgmental I am about others, the more I feel I'm being judged.

The more that I harbor an idea that I am somehow so different that no one can understand me and the idea that they always belittle me because they don't 'get it' , the more I project that attitude and it and make it truth.

I realized that what I always perceived as judgment of others was really the reflection of my judgment about 'them.'

This was a heart wrenching, gut busting revelation.

When I alter my expectation, my perception is transformed.

I believe that this was a revelation from the Lord, and then, in upon farther consideration, I realized that it was God giving me a personal interpretation of this scripture for my heart.

Romans 12
Living Sacrifices
1Therefore, I urge you, brothers, in view of God's mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God—this is your spiritual[a] act of worship. 2Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.

3For by the grace given me I say to every one of you: Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgment, in accordance with the measure of faith God has given you. 4Just as each of us has one body with many members, and these members do not all have the same function, 5so in Christ we who are many form one body, and each member belongs to all the others. 6We have different gifts, according to the grace given us. If a man's gift is prophesying, let him use it in proportion to his faith. 7If it is serving, let him serve; if it is teaching, let him teach; 8if it is encouraging, let him encourage; if it is contributing to the needs of others, let him give generously; if it is leadership, let him govern diligently; if it is showing mercy, let him do it cheerfully.
9Love must be sincere. Hate what is evil; cling to what is good. 10Be devoted to one another in brotherly love. Honor one another above yourselves. 11Never be lacking in zeal, but keep your spiritual fervor, serving the Lord. 12Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer. 13Share with God's people who are in need. Practice hospitality.

14Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse. 15Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn. 16Live in harmony with one another. Do not be proud, but be willing to associate with people of low position.[c] Do not be conceited.

17Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everybody. 18If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. 19Do not take revenge, my friends, but leave room for God's wrath, for it is written: "It is mine to avenge; I will repay,"[d]says the Lord. 20On the contrary:
"If your enemy is hungry, feed him;
if he is thirsty, give him something to drink.
In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head."[e] 21Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.

I have been feeling so different. I have so much joy, I mean abundant joy. This judgment thing has been a generational monkey of a curse on the back of my family and I feel so completely set free from it!

I am so thankful to the my precious Savior for bringing it about.

I'm so excited about all the ways that this is opening up my heart and life to have close fellowship that I was so long denied by believing the whisperings of the great deceiver in my ears.


Ash said...

Allison, I can relate to your post in so many brought tears to my eyes. Thanks for sharing this. <3

Hilaire said...

Hi Allison! Might I copy this days blog to share with some friends?