You are deceived.
This pit of dispair is brought to you courtesy of the GREAT DECEIVER!
You are God's precious creation.
He made you beautiful, you are beautiful, your husband holds you up as a beautiful wife.
It's time to say "Get thee behind me Satan." and find the beautiful woman in the mirror, and see her as HE intends her to be seen.
I do know how hard this is.
I certainly struggle with body hatred...this body that has grown four beautiful children, birthed them mightily, fed them heartily, yet I find myself loathing what He has created.
When I hate myself like that, though, it is blasphemy, for He created me beautifully....fearfully, wonderfully for His pleasure.
It is time to Pray! Ask God to show you yourself as He sees you. Ask Him for His heart and His eyes. If you ask Him for bread, will he give you a stone?
If you learn to do this, the cycle will break and your children will see it and learn it and understand how beautiful they are to their Creator because of you. You can do it!